How My Writing Has Evolved Over the Year

Over the year my writing has become more specific and to the point. In the beginning of the year my biggest problem was being to general; now, at the end of the year, I can narrow down my topic and write a focused essay. I am more capable of avoiding “extra” thesis’ and arguments.

Also, I have learned many terms for rhetorical analysis and I can now further understand both the writings of others and myself. Having a more in-depth understanding of the effects certain writing styles and devices can have has enabled me to write papers more effective at achieving their purpose.

My MLA skills have also improved extremely, including being able to create a works cited and knowing how to use in-text citations.

Argument- Final Exam Timed Writing

How great would a world without people, without anyone else, be to the most avid of readers? He would have all the books and libraries in the world to himself, his own never-ending supply of enjoyment. All day he would spend in his chair, reading book after book day after day, all to his own pleasure. But what if this man had imperfect vision, and required glasses; God-forbid he should break his only pair of them. An episode of The Twilight Zone explored this man’s predicament as they portrayed him unable to continue on in a world of all he ever wanted. The man knew not of how to fix his glasses; he was supremely unknowledgeable on everything except for reading books. And when he faced a problem which prevented him from doing his favorite activity, there was nothing he could to fix it. He had no knowledge of how to fix his glasses, and he lacked the innovative ability to figure out how. This man, as most avid readers are, was inhibited by the narrow views and knowledge impressed upon him by the many books he read, while truly great thinkers are uninfringed upon by books and able to be innovative through their use of real-life experience and wisdom.

Textbooks are used in high school classes worldwide to provide instruction to students, and multiple books are assigned each year just for English classes in order to teach proper writing. However, a good teacher will hold multiple discussions with students in between chapters of Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice, hoping to yield all-important analysis from even the shyest student. A good teacher will strive to get students to form opinions of their own, to form their own understanding of mercy and attachment and comprehend the applicability of these motifs in the real world. This analysis is often times quite varied among the students, yet it is all commended- the mere recognition of an individual opinion is the first goal. Teachers recognize the importance of teaching historical facts and writing styles through books, but they also know that the ability to understand and form an individual opinion is even more important. Mere reliance on the text itself is not sufficient.

This is why the world’s greatest thinker are not the ones who spend their times in libraries all day, but rather those who go out and do on their own. Books impede this process by making the reader reliant on the information in the text and therefore unable to themselves “further the race of man”-the narrow “teachings” of written out books offer little room for creative originality. Without books, man is free do make whatever decision he wants without constant reliance on a source foreign to himself, much like a man who feels no complement to rely on another man. Where would half of our country be if it were not for the Louisiana Purchase under Thomas Jefferson’s presidency? Literally, we wouldn’t have it. However, most people don’t know that the actual purchase was made by Robert Livingston, in France, far from Jefferson’s explicit instruction. Napoleon made the initial offer to Livingston for an area that would double the U.S. Livingston had only come for New Orleans. However, being the innovative thinker he was, Livingston was able to seal the deal himself, without having to go home to Jefferson and ask.

            Livingston was able to think for himself, without the necessary instruction of Jefferson. In the same way, great thinkers of our world are able to innovate, themselves, without the influence of books. Truly, how can one enlighten the world and “further the race of man” through books? The only knowledge in those books has already been discovered! In contrast, the world offers continuously-fresh ideas, knowledge and beliefs, all with which only the open-mind of a great thinker can put to use.

            Books, like an overbearing boss, inhibit innovation. The narrow beliefs they offer restrict progress, while those who refrain from avid reading are open to abundant paths toward enlightenment.

Statement: This writing is “excellent” because it is well structured. The essay begins with an interesting example from a modern-ish television program that most people have heard of- this attracts the audience’s attention while helping to establish my argument. After finishing the intro with a unique thesis, I use the play Merchant of Venice as concrete evidence to support my claim, while at the same time appealing to the values and insight of my audience, being a teacher. I also analyze a certain practice- being Socratic Seminars- for a higher purpose. I then use an analogy to compare the effect of books to a piece of history most people are at least familiar with- the Louisiana Purchase. Through this analogy I appeal to the audience’s logos as I make the connection between being free from the reliance of books and being free from the reliance of a boss. This helps the audience to further comprehend my argument. Finally I insert a final bit of quick, syllogistic reason before I restate my argument in my short conclusion. Overall the essay explains to the reader my argument and reinforces it with both examples and logic.

"Deep" Annotations with Analysis of Women's Rights are Human Rights by Hillary Clinton

Statement: This analysis of the speech given by Hillary Clinton on Women’s Rights is “excellent” because it efficiently defines the two devices used by Clinton in the second quote while displaying how she uses them in her speech. The QEJ also correctly analyzes the purpose of Clinton’s use of chiasmus, and uses higher-level vocabulary to do so. Finally this paper also displays “excellent” rhetorical analysis skills by determining the effect of Clinton’s rhetorical devices, what the main idea of the passage was, and tying all the analysis together into a “who cares” which states the true intent and audience of Clinton’s speech.

Impulse We Trust: The True American Motto

Andrew Seastream

Mrs. Blankenship

AP Language and Composition

5/20/12

Impulse We Trust: The True American Motto

            He has been called Lin-credible, Lin-tastic and Lin-vincible. He rose from the lowly level of bench-warming Harvard-man to team-carrying, high-scoring star of the New York Knicks. Jeremy Lin’s recent moment in the spotlight may be over, but in his prime Lin was the center of the American sports-world. He was talked about daily, not only on sports networks like ESPN, but in “every bar, every grocery line, you would hear it,” (Lopresti). Yet the mediocre statistics put up in the final games played by Lin before his season-ending injury, and the inevitable decline in public interest that followed reveal not only an inclination of American sports fans to quickly jump on popular athlete’s “bandwagons”, but their truly impulsive nature which drives their everyday lives.

            Americans have always been an impulsive people, and a comprehensive understanding of this could allow us to assess decisions we have made in the past, and decisions we have yet to make. An American can often trace the position they are in, be it economical, sociological or political, back through a roadmap of hasty decisions they have made without truly thorough consideration. However, the typical American fails to learn from a reflection of this sort and instead thrusts onward in life until they experience success; in this way the American Experience reasserts itself day after day, week after week, one impulsive decision at a time.

            Yet there are those who would deny that impulse is the true American Experience at all, including the modern retail industry. Many of us can admit to the occasional “impulse buy” while we are shopping: one has a set list of items when they walk in the store, but when they leave they have those set items and more, usually goods strategically placed to get customers to make wanton purchases. However, recent studies have shown that products typically bought on impulse, such as sunglasses and tights, have been experiencing sharply declining sales, indicating that American shoppers are becoming more frugal with their money (Edgecliffe-Johnson). Some believe this may be a result of lower incomes caused by the recent Recession, and that customers are simply holding a tighter grip on their money.  This decline of impulse purchases then indicates that Americans are becoming more rational as money becomes harder to come by.

            Members and analysts of the American political system may also find fault in the claim that impulse is the American Experience. Congressional hearings and decisions have historically been slow and long-awaited, as the Senators and Representatives from different parties take their time deliberating over the political issues of our country. At the end of 2011, a Congressional “Supercommittee” consisting of 12 Republicans and Democrats revealed that they had failed to make any decision on how to alleviate our national debt, the task for which they had been convened (Fitzgerald). This failure by the Supercommittee is indicative of the recent and indeed historical process of the American Congress, being that it is slow and unable to settle on certain policies. The Supercommittee carefully considered the situation presented before them, and, even though it was a dire one, did not exhibit any impulsive nature; in fact, they were so non-impulsive that they didn’t make any decisions at all.

            Even our educational system would have a shot at any claim of an American Experience of impulsiveness. College admission processes are known to be extremely competitive and admittance to top-tier colleges is very difficult. There is perhaps no more selective college in America than Harvard University, which requires near-perfect grades in high school along with a stellar extracurricular resume from its applicants. Harvard’s Admission Office claims in its site’s “Frequently Asked Questions” section that their students are chosen through a series of committee meetings which “very carefully” consider the information for each applicant in a process that can take several months (Harvard). Harvard, like many other universities, believes that their application process carefully considers each applicant in an unbiased manor, that if anything what they do is not impulsive. Their admittance offices deliberate to a large extent over selecting future students from their thousands of applicants, and because many other colleges are faced with the same task of picking the best students for their school, this may indicate that most colleges go through a non-impulsive process similar to the one Harvard claims to use.

            Yet while the recent decline in impulsive consumer decisions, inability of Congress to make decisions, and claim by college admissions offices that they make carefully-considered decisions may lead one to believe that the American Experience is one of caution and prudence, a wider view of American history and culture reveals that Americans are in fact driven by their impulses. Impulsiveness can be found in the idiosyncratic American lifestyle and while it can sometimes lead to regret over the lack of consideration given to certain choices during Americans’ lives, it hardly ever leads to change.

            The Gold Rush of 1849 caused many people to leave their homes for California in order to have a chance at the large supply of gold there (United States). So many people left that labor in other areas of the country became hard to come by. The trip to California was dangerous, as the drinking water along the way was of poor condition (“Gold Rush”). However, many chose to impulsively leave their family and friends for the trip anyways. The decisions by many to go to California for gold were often ill-conceived and not thoroughly thought out, as they were derived mainly from the hype spreading throughout the country, and even through the President himself (United States). The migrants had their minds on the riches they could get, and not on the dangers involved; they made an impulsive decision to go to California and try to get rich, which may lead some to believe that they may have been greedy in some ways.

            Yet perhaps it is not a greedy nature but instead an opportunistic drive that makes Americans so impulsive. In the early 1800’s, when then-President Thomas Jefferson sent Robert Livingston to France in order to negotiate with the Emperor Napoleon, he was simply aiming to acquire the New Orleans territory (“Louisiana Purchase”). However, when the embattled French leader offered much more, Livingston agreed to the deal without consulting Jefferson (Ibid). The deal was over the budget provided by Jefferson, but Livingston thought that he would agree on the fantastic terms provided (Ibid). It was this impulsive decision that saved the deal from potentially falling off the table, and nearly doubled the size of the U.S. This is a typical form of American impulsiveness, as it reflects the opportunities present in America and the eagerness of Americans to jump on these opportunities, impulsively, because they believe the opportunities will be beneficial for them. American impulsiveness often consists of "seizing-of-the-moment" opportunities such as the Louisiana Purchase, which has led to great prosperity for our country.

            And perhaps no one knows better of “seizing-of-the-moment” opportunities than Rosa Parks, who was riding a bus while sitting behind the ten seats designated for white people when she was told to vacate her seat. Given that she had already moved aside in the same row to make room for a white man, she refused to give up her seat and was later tried in court for her indignance (U.S. District Court). Rosa Parks made the decision during her famous bus ride to not give up her seat to the white man, even though the white section of the bus was overflowing and the bus driver instructed her to get up so that the white man could sit down. Rosa Parks was already sitting in the colored section, and she believed that she should not have to give up her seat for a white man to sit down. She made an impulsive decision during that bus ride to stand her ground and sit down for her rights, and while she was arrested for it she ended up victorious through the Montgomery Bus Boycott that followed under her leadership. Parks' impulsiveness to stand up for what she believed in is a common part of the American Experience, as Americans often assert their beliefs at the slightest challenge. Rosa Parks could not have known that day that the white section would overflow into the colored section, but when she was asked to vacate her seat she still made an impulsive decision to stand up for herself and tell the white man "no". Parks instincts told her that she needed to defend her beliefs, and in doing so she reestablished impulse as the American Experience.

            Thus Americans encounter the influence of impulse nearly every day, and their failures and achievements in life derive from this influence. Their experience as Americans has driven them to snap decisions that turn out either beautiful or disastrous, beneficial or detrimental. One could look back and reflect on these decisions, attempt to learn from their mistakes and prepare for the future; however, a true American chooses to take their impulsive experiences in stride, wading forward in the depths of trial and error until, finally, they can emerge above it all and bask in the glow of their long-awaited fortune. Only after making multiple impulsive decisions such as investing in Facebook because one was “caught up in the excitement of an enormous social media company going public”, then losing a great deal of money as the stock price plummeted can one experience the success felt by those Americans who impulsively joined the California Gold Rush (Jones). And only then, at the moment of success, is there time for reflection, time to decide which of their impulsive decisions were well-made or poorly-conceived. The American Experience is one of impulsiveness, and in the fast-paced culture of modern society he or she who challenges this claim is already a step behind.

Works Cited

Edgecliffe-Johnson, Andrew. “Impulse Buying Gives Way to US Frugality.” Financial Times. The Financial Times Limited 2012, 4 Nov. 2009. Web. 20 Mar. 2012.

Fitzgerald, Thomas. “Paralysis on Debt Further Erodes Congress’ Image.” Philadelphia Inquirer 22 Nov. 2011. General OneFile. Web. 10 Apr. 2012.

“Gold Rush.”  10 Days That Unexpectedly Changed America. The History Channel. 2006. American History in Video. Web. 23 Mar. 2012.

Harvard College Office of Admissions. “Applying to Harvard Frequently Asked Questions.” Harvard College Office of Admissions. Harvard College. Web. 10 Apr. 2012.

Jones, Roland. "Facebook's Bungled IPO Ticks Off Small Investors." Market Day.
     MSNBC, 25 May 2012. Web. 25 May 2012.

Lopresti, Mike. “People Who Barely Follow the NBA Are Jumping on the Lin Bandwagon: ‘Linsanity’ Hits Toronto Tonight.” McClatchy-Tribune 14 Feb. 2012. eLibrary. Web. 23 Mar. 2012.

“The Louisiana Purchase.” Monticello, Home of Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson Foundation, Inc., Feb. 2003. Web. 23 Mar. 2012.

United States. James K. Polk: Annual Message . By James Polk. Washington: United States, 1848. Books & Authors. Web. 23 Mar. 2012.

U.S. District Court for Middle District of Alabama. Illustration of Bus where Rosa Parks Sat. 1955. National Archives and Records Administration-Southeast Region, East Point, GA. The National Archives. Web. 23 Mar. 2012.